One of my pet hates is when a customer tries to use their job to change the outcome of a situation. Often these types of people are police officers and lawyers who don’t hesitate to tell you that everything about you, including the way you answer the phone, is illegal. It can be a bit worrying though when you end up speaking to the people who are supposed to have the ultimate authority on such a decision, and find they are wrong.
Liza: Good afternoon you’re through to Liza in collections. How can I help?
Mr Justice: Yes. I am sick of you accusing me of negligence.
Liza: OK. On what date did we accuse you of that?
Mr Justice: Every week! I get letters from you every week telling me that I have not been in contact with you regarding the arrears and that I have seven days to pay.
Mr Justice: And then low and behold, a week later you send me another letter!
Liza: Yes, we will do. OK, well…
Mr Justice: And before you go ahead with your apologies and excuses, I’m a judge. Most of the cases I deal with are regarding situations such as this and I already know a considerable amount more than you do.
*I glance at the arrears owing on his account*
Liza: I don’t doubt that. So, where in the letter does it say that you have been negligent?
Mr Justice: I’ve just bloody told you! The part where it says I haven’t been in contact. Can’t you read? You sent the damn thing, you should at least have the decency to know what it said.
Liza: I’ll have a look.
Mr Justice: And if you’ll check your notes on your system, like you’re supposed to do on every call then you’ll see that I speak to you every day about this issue.
Liza: Yes, I’ve noticed that.
Mr Justice: Well then?
Liza: You rang us on the 21st, the 20th, the 19th, the 18th and the 17th to say that you are unhappy about being accused of negligence on your part.
*Mr Justice laughs*
Mr Justice: But the irony of that has probably been missed by you, I expect. Was it?
Liza: And the agents involved told you that there is a legal disclaimer on the letter to advise that if you have been in contact with us, to disregard the letter. You might have missed that, though.
Liza: Oh and sorry, to answer your question. I have noticed the irony.